so that fucking asshole actually called me today... the whole situation is sooo ironic... well today is my birthday for one, and i was just facebooking, and i set my status to owl city lyrics... "I spend my coldest nights, alone awake and thinking of the weekend we were in love"... and i just liked that song but i kinda did have him in mind.. less than 10 seconds after i posted it my phone rang, and it said "Withheld" call.. and i was like wtf.... and he came to mind again... and then my phone rang again and it was his number.. i was like WTF... i picked up idk why and i said hello... he was like, "is this jessika?" and i was like yeah... then i told him i couldnt talk on the phone, i told him to go online and he said ok... we talked for a lil while on there, and he told me he still loved and cared about me... i had to go eat dinner so i told him id talk to him when i was done... so i came back on and he was still online, and i imed him a few times and it took him a while to respond, and he said he had to go cuz he was talkin to someone on the phone..  i was like whatever... so that was that and then he called me again around 9:00.. i texted him and told him i could talk later tonight when everyone was asleep... he said ok... and about an hour ago i texted him and told him to go online.. he didnt respond and he never came online... i called him a couple times with no answer... so i guess im not that important

We're all a part of something, it's big and important and magical.

I guess to some extent, you get used to being alone. You get used to not expecting phone calls & having nothing to do at night. You don’t expect to turn around to open arms any longer. The small sounds have been replaced by silence. Your thoughts echo through your head, with no one to share them with. All in all, being alone isn’t terrible, it just hurts like hell.

All you had to do was call me.

I'm depressed.