So wednsday my family and I are leaving for florida then goin on our cruise. I'm excited for the most part, but terrified that my anxiety will act up. I'm scared of screwing everything up, I feel like I'm under so much pressure. I hope I can control it and I end up having a nice time. Ugh.

Loneliness leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to.... well, more loneliness I guess.

this is so unbelieveably true.

turn up the volume! .. yeah im pretty much obsessed with this song.. <3 it

Owl City – The Christmas Song

It’s Christmas and we walk alone
Two strangers with no one to miss us
On our own
Out in the cold

Trudging onward
Braving a harsh winter storm
You and I met passing by
And now our spirits feel warm

I don’t have anyone at home to talk to
And you don’t have anything to do
So I’ll spend my Christmas with you
I’ll spend my Christmas with you

It’s Christmas and we are in love
With the way that the soft snowflakes kiss us
From far above
The blustery breeze

Trudging onward
Braving a harsh winter storm
You and I met passing by
And now our spirits feel warm

I believe that Jesus is truly the only way
I celebrate Christmas because it’s his birthday

I don’t have anyone at home to talk to
And you don’t have anything to do
So I’ll spend my Christmas with you
I’ll spend my Christmas with you
I’ll spend my Christmas with you
I’ll spend my Christmas with you

Life's just this big empty hole. No one can fill it. Nothing can fill it. It's like I'm waiting for the life I know I'll never have. I'm dreaming in color, but I'm living in black and white.

No one to talk to. Nothing to turn to. It feels as if my existence is pointless, there's no real reason for me to be here. I'm only filled with temporary moments of feeling loved and cared about, but always end up feeling alone and isolated.

I'm a shell of the person I used to be. That person is long gone and probably never coming back. Ever.

- By: Me

I wrote this. It's how I feel right now. Let me know what you think of it.

I've always avoided fights. I make jokes instead. I tell people what they want to hear in order to avoid a confrontation. I pretend to want things I don't want, and I pretend not to want things I do want. No one gets hurt. Except me.The lines are so crossed and blurred at this point that I don't know what I want. I just know I want it to be easy.